Orlando.

The word once synonymous with magical memories and family adventures now strikes our hearts with grief, fear, and anger..

I (Sara) was part of 9/11. Not in the Pentagon, but working and living very close by. My building shook, I saw the flames, felt the blast, and smelled the smells of terror that no one thinks about.

I also got to huddle with my roommates, who at one point I thought were dead, in our apartment on Army Navy Drive and grieve. Alone. With no “noise” other than the news channels of which we were barely aware in our zombie-like state of shock and survival.

Times have changed, haven’t they? Within minutes of an attack, millions of us are online.

It’s very cathartic to grieve together… but then the opinions start to swirl. And, wow, if ever there was an opportunity for opinions, its been with the Orlando shooting. I was immediately bombarded with opinions on immigration and gun control, homosexuality and the evangelical response or the political response.

I made a great many mistakes after the Paris attacks with how I handled my social media presence. I did not want to fall into that same trap again.

And so, the Sunday after the Orlando shooting…I did the unthinkable. I took a FB hiatus to mourn the victims.

I took 24 hours to stop – say nothing, read nothing, hear nothing – and simply be still.

 

I wondered, really, what good would come of this? Would I sit in sackcloth and ashes all day? I honestly didn’t know! But I knew my volatile emotions could not be trusted on a public forum like Facebook and I needed to put myself in timeout.

It was the best decision I could have made.

The next morning, as I habitually reached for my phone upon waking up, I put it down and prayed instead. Here is what I prayed continually throughout the day:

1. That God would reveal Himself in the midst of the grief of the victims and their families.
2. That the gospel would shine and transform lives.
3. That Christians would extend God’s healing power through love.
4. That God would help me to remain calm and not point fingers.
5. That, instead, God would show me what I can do to help, to heal, and to change.

You know what else happened? I was able to focus on my life and my family. I was not agitated thinking about the comment someone made on my post about immigration. I was not sucked into my phone exchanging barbs with a stranger on a friend’s page over gun control. I was not hurting my fellow believers with my obvious dismay at their opposing viewpoints.

I just lived. And loved. And prayed. And simply grieved.

 

And God gave me a gift. He reminded me of a verse that I had memorized 20 years ago to help me with my temper and razor-sharp tongue.

“He who answers before listening: that is his folly and his shame.” Proverbs 18:13

 

This verse washed over me during that 24 hours of silence.

A verse written thousands of years ago could have been tailor-made for Facebook!

How many times have I shot off an opinion without gathering information, listening to another view point to see what I’m missing, and thinking about the impact my words could have on my relationships?

During my little Facebook Fast, God reminded me that His commands are timeless and are meant to protect me.

So, as I mourned the senseless, horrific loss of life in Orlando, God also called me to some serious self-reflection.

Maybe, should something like this happen again, the best thing you and I can do is stop.

Stop the snarky memes, the angry attacks, and pointless obsession with our newsfeed.

Or, maybe we should go. Go toward people, love them, infuse our page with love and encouragement and moments of good and hope as a refreshing alternative.

Being a Facebook junkie, I did not think I would make it 24 hours! But, now I wish I had gone 48 hours.

I never, ever, ever want something like the Orlando shootings to happen again. But if it does, I will honor the victims with a 24-hour pause to honor, grieve, reflect, and pray.