It’s January, so I’m reading Genesis*.
From the very beginning, we see two neighbors (who happened to be brothers) at odds as Cain became so angry that he attacked and killed his younger brother, Abel.
Relationships between neighbors have never been easy.
At least mine haven’t. My neighbors can get on my nerves, whether it’s a leaky septic system, disagreements between our kids, or a light that shines in my eyes all night long.
When my neighbor had to reschedule her daughter’s birthday party, my daughter wasn’t invited to the new gala. These girls had been friends for years (ok, the two only-children had been bickering for years between bouts of best-friendship), and to hear the little girls’ laughter from across the street while we sat home alone and unwanted would have been unbearable. It was the last straw, and I angrily typed out an email explaining just what I thought of this family and what they could do with their party.
Something whispered, “Wait.”
And so I slept on it before hitting that send button. (This was back in the day before texts and social media, when it was easier to show some restraint.)
Early the next morning, my neighbor called with a frantic family emergency. I didn’t do much, just stayed with her while her tribe gathered. But it was enough. We stood in her kitchen with nothing between us but coffee and prayer. She gave me a backstory that replaced my anger with insight and compassion—and a pretty, pink invitation they’d been meaning to deliver.
Jesus said anger is the same as murder. I had come this close to murdering our friendship, killing any hope for helping one another out, and effectively ending any opportunity to share the saving grace of Jesus Christ.
When Cain murdered his brother, Abel, he famously argued with God and asked, “Am I my brother’s keeper?”
And God said yes! Yes, you are your neighbor’s keeper, guardian, and protector.
And so are we.
When God places us in proximity to people—when we’re in the same tribe, like Cain and Abel—we are responsible to watch over them and keep them safe, to work through conflicts to find common ground and compromise. These difficult relationships have a redemptive purpose as they draw us closer to God and teach us about His mercy.
Jesus summed up the entire Bible in two commands: “Love God, and love your neighbors.”
Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.” Matthew 22:37-40 NLT
Cain broke both commands to love God and love his neighbors, and this is reflected in his punishment: he was kicked out of the Garden of Eden and cursed to wander the earth aimlessly.
Cain replied to the Lord, “My punishment is too great for me to bear! You have banished me from the land and from your presence; you have made me a homeless wanderer. Anyone who finds me will kill me!” Genesis 4:13-14 NLT
When we blow it with our neighbors like Cain did, we suffer the same fate: separation from God and others.
Blows to our neighbors hurt our Father’s heart, too.
* Daily Bible Reading Plans
I follow a daily Bible reading plan each year. No matter what translation I read or how I read it, this daily habit transforms my relationship with God and shapes my day.
This year, I’m using the New Living Translation Life Application Study Bible (NLT). Last year, I used my New King James Spirit Filled Life Bible (NKJV) from ministry school, finding new inspiration in my decade-old notes. The year before I read an online version of the Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB) translation using a Bible app.
If you’d like to give it a try, here are a few resources:
- The Bible Project has an app, online reading plan, and daily email reminders, but I printed the daily Scripture Plan and am following along in my hard copy. You’ll read 3-5 chapters a day in roughly chronological order (plus one Psalm a day), and enjoy incredible videos that explain important Biblical themes.
- The Bible App by YouVersion offers a plan called CCV The Bible in ONE Year that includes readings from the Old Testament, New Testament and Psalms or Proverbs. There are no readings on weekends, allowing you time to catch up. Use any translation you’d like, and you can create notes, highlights and sharable images overlaid with your favorite verses.
- The Blended Plan from Blue Letter Bible adds variety to your reading with a non-traditional sequence. For example, while reading the book of Isaiah, you are also reading the book of Mark. You can download a list of daily readings, read online or use their app.
It’s never too late to begin; you can set any of these programs to start today!
Amy, these are wise words. Thank you for sharing them.
Thank you for sharing them, too!
Wow, what a powerful post! I have a neighbor who was creeping me out last summer/fall. He kept showing up when we were outside and he just seemed to hover around. I admit to hurrying off out of sight if I saw him coming. Just today I saw an ambulance at his house and felt regret for my actions. Maybe he just wanted to be a part of what he thought we had. I’m hoping I have another opportunity to love this neighbor in the future.
DeeDee, I’ve got some of those regrets myself. The only redeeming thing I can think to do with them is make sure it doesn’t happen again. May God bless you and your neighbors!
I’ve not heard of the Bible Project yet, but it looks fantastic. I just printed off their PDF–thank you! You always offer great wisdom, Amy! Thanks for being YOU!
You will love it! Their videos are exceptional. Love you, Cindy! <3